Potatoes or rice?

Potatoes or rice? Fries or chips? Ketchup or mustard? Ranch or vinaigrette? Credit or debit? Some things are relatively easy to decide. For the food choices it's a quick check-in with the Taste Buds followed by the verbalization of what they told you to say. Standing at the gas pump choosing "credit or debit," weighing the $0.75 debit bank charge versus the credit card interest rate versus the credit card points ... woah. That's high math. Just push a button and somehow fork over $40.

Like credit or debit, fries or chips, ketchup or mustard, there are often easy choices in life and we make them regularly with somewhat limited brain involvement. There are even times we say "both!" I mean, sometimes you just want ketchup AND mustard on a hot dog. (And a napkin, please.)

Last night as I was about to enter the check-out line at the store and contemplating the cash-or-credit choice that was to come, Drew hit me with another choice when he asked which of the following was correct (hold on to your hat):

Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia or Sesquipedalophobia

HUH?! All cash-or-credit mental activity screeched to a halt. Hippo-what? Seismic activity was now registering in the brain. The cashier wants an answer on the cash-or-credit question. Cashier dude is trying to text on his cell phone while bagging our items. I really want to ask him if the company gave him customer service training, have second thoughts on that and also figure he's not going to be able to answer the hippo or sesquips question. I say "cash" and hope there's enough in the wallet. My brain goes back to hippos. Drew's giggling. Thankfully we complete the financial transaction at hand without so much as a cursory 'thank you' from cash register dude (can you say "letter to corporate?") and I'm put out of my misery shortly thereafter with the following answers:

Hippopotomonstrosequippedaliophobia is the fear of long words. At 35 letters it is one of the longest words in the English language. Sesquipedalophobia is the shorter version and most often used in print because, well, it's shorter. I don't think my son suffers from this particular phobia. Possibly mother-about-to-kill-me-because-I-couldn't-find-my-homework-at-6:20-this-morning-phobia but definitely not a fear of long words.

Potatoes or rice, anyone?

Is that the dinner bell?

No, it's the SCHOOL bell! Today was the first day of high school. Unlike preschool, kindergarten, first grade and second grade, the Teenager Code apparently now prohibits mothers from taking photos on the first day of school. Honest. Luckily I asked before reaching for the camera, thus saving myself a citation and ridiculous fine.

Appropriate for table conversation

It is Friday. In the office we're all dragging from a hectic week, giddy from staying up way too late to watch the Olympics, delighted it's payday, even more excited that the weekend is almost upon us. This giddy crew is in a meeting this morning, slam-dunks a presentation, and then starts talking about cartoons and kids' characters from back when we were little. (Contrary to Drew's opinion, we did indeed have television when I was little. Color TV, at that.) Smurfs, Monchichi's, Gem, Rainbow Bright, Sesame Street ... it all led down a dangerous path to Statler and Waldorf and then twisted to the even more dangerous Mahna Mahna.

Just because I'm a nice person and feel it's only appropriate to share our Mahna Mahna giddiness, I hereby present the giggle fest of the afternoon:



Go, Statler and Waldorf! And "mahna mahna" to you as you start your weekend! :-)

The battle of the nest

I couldn't take it any more. It had been nagging at me all summer and I finally snapped this past weekend. The younger turkey's nest was just a mess! Not only a mess but we've lived in this coop for 2 years and his walls were still naked. Egads. So I finally broke the "non interference" rule, invoked the Monroe Doctrine, and marched on the #2 Nest. Swiffer dusters peeking out from the tool belt, drill firmly in hand, I was ready for battle. (Cue theme song.)

It was a brutal day in the Nest. The battle left me breathless at times and my heart was racing as I defeated moldy kitchenware, and recycled water bottles and soda cans. I was dusty, grimy, sweaty, and fighting with a broken nail. A quick trip to the mess hall at noon and a session with the emery board then I was ready for the afternoon's battle. A couple lone spiders tried to get me off my game but there was no deterrance. Socks were thrown in to the hamper, trash swept ruthlessly in to bins. Curtain rods - UP! Wall shelves - INSTALLED! Carpet - CLEAN! Bed linens - CHANGED! And just like that the battle was over. I retreated to the larger nest, cleaned and polished the drill before locking it in its case, changed out of camo gear, donned the sunglasses, and left to pick up Drew who was returning from camp.

The Battle of the Nest was hastily called so no journalists were embedded for the fray. However, your intrepid blogger did snap these before and after shots:

BEFORE:

AFTER:

Turkey in a partridge's tree

On the second day of summer my lovely son gave to me, 11 days in Turkey and a smile broader than the Chesapeake Bay Bridge. By the end of summer, my lovely son gave to me:

• 11 days in Turkey
• 10 loads of laundry
  
• 9 new blog entries
  
• 8 iTunes mixes
  
• 7 consecutive nights at home
  
• 6 days at Massanutten
  
• 5 weeks at camp!
  
• 4 picasa photo albums
  
• 3 new suitcases
• 2 doctor visits

and a smile broader than the Chesapeake Bay Bridge. :)

Not the pilgrim's mayflower

We had company this weekend. My friend Melissa was en route from Cincinnati to Roanoke and engineered a visit in between business opportunities. She arrived Sunday morning--via plane, not the Mayflower--and we promptly took her to our favorite show-it-off-to-out-of-towners site, Annapolis, for the day. We toured the Naval Academy, had ice cream at Storm Bros., briskly walked through downtown as the parking meter was about to run out, crossed the bridge to Eastport and ooh'd and aah'd at the yachts, and then drove home through rain and hail to make dinner and watch the Olympics. The next morning we dropped off Drew for the final camp of the summer, then continued south to Roanoke where we spent 24 hours before coming back north for M to catch a flight home from Dulles. It was quite a whirlwind tour!

In the photo above you can see the ship My Shanti moored outside of the Annapolis Yacht Club. To call this ship a beauty is an understatement! The photo doesn't do it justice. That's the Eastport bridge to the left and just peeking out beyond the ship you can see the blue-gray siding of the Yacht Club. If you look really closely you can even see a smaller boat sitting on the deck. Yep, the ship is THAT big!

Here are some shots Drew took at the Naval Academy:

Leftovers

This is Drew immediately after boy scout camp and just before his desmellifying treatment (ie, shower). Thumb still attached. The stitches came out one week later and all is well.

See the patch on his right pocket? That's the totin' chip earned for demonstrating "proper handling, care, and use of the pocket knife, ax, and saw." I checked and they don't take the patch away when "improper use" is noted. I'm relieved because sewing these patches on is a pain in the butt!

Gobble, gobble!

The following was consumed at our house last night in about an hour and a half:

a big bowl of cheerios with milk
an entire box of mac and cheese
3 "fish sticks" (strips of cod dredged in bread crumbs and baked. Shhh! Drew eats 'em because he thinks they come from a box!)
1/2 a bowl of grapes
1/2 a bag of sour cream and onion potato chips
1 can of root beer
1 bottle of water

Are you thinking what I'm thinking? That we need to seriously brush our teeth? Well, there is that. But here's what really got me going: I'm gonna be broke. Seriously! Penniless. Insolvent. Fiduciarily challenged. Strapped. Impecunious. Destitute. Whatever you want to call it - broke! Drew ate all of the above in a span of 90 bleeping minutes! Yep. ALL of it. He had dinner and was still hungry so he kept coming back for more. After polishing off the fish, mac and grapes that had been fixed for his dinner, he was digging through the fridge and pantry to see what else he could find. The only reason he finally stopped eating is because he fell asleep on the couch watching Science Channel. (I'd fall asleep too, but that's another story.)

You've seen the photos - he's 5'10" and 136 pounds as of last week - the kid has no room for all this food. We don't even have a dog he could be secretly feeding! But if last night was indication, it looks like teenagerdom has finally settled in for the long haul. I'm bracing for a huge hit to the grocery budget and a growth spurt within the next 6 weeks. Yep, I'm gonna be broke.

Oh, and just to set the record straight, my dinner consisted of a strip of fish and side salad.

Turkey in Turkey

Ladies and gentlemen, turkeys of all ages, it's the moment we've all been waiting for ... Drew's photos from Turkey!