The million dollar fantasy

$171,000,000

That's right -- the lottery is up to one hundred and seventy one million smackers. Needless to say, I bought a lottery ticket last night. No. I bought FIVE lottery tickets last night! Wouldn't it be fun to start a blog about winning the lottery? ;-)

Just shoot me

Drew came home from December's camping trip with a rifle shooting merit badge. It wasn't until last week that I saw this picture, though. It makes me laugh and cringe at the same time. I showed it to a few folks and this is what they've said:

A mom: Oh, the poor dears! It's obviously too cold to be outside. Look at his little nose! Get these boys inside and warm!

A former boy scout: When I was in scouts and we were at the rifle range ... (he then talked for 10 minutes. I don't remember much of the one-sided conversation except that it had to do with squirrels.)

A fundraiser: Why don't they go to the indoor shooting range? Do you need some ideas for raising money?

A teenage boy: Lock and load!

Another mom: You LET him do this?

Yet another mom: This is why they don't take moms on their camping trips.

A 30-year-old single man: BLEEP! (This comment is not fit for the genteel blogosphere.)

Scholarship Dude: YIKES! Children with rifles?!?!

So I'm still laughing and cringing.

Homage to fromage

For reasons that would take a book to explain, my diet no longer includes cheese or coffee. Omitting them was a cold turkey move on December 26th. That is 55 days, 79,200 minutes, 1320 hours, or 4,752,000 seconds depending on how you look at it. But really, who's counting? (Forgot one - 7.8 weeks.) My beloved java and fromage. Sigh. Oh, how I miss them. And if my wonderful, loving, caring, generous child (cough!) keeps pointing them out in the grocery store, holding them up and talking about the sale prices, posing with them, using the words "cheese" and "coffee" like frisbees in the wind ... welllllll ... I see your "cheese," dear turkey, and raise you one "frappuccino!" Ha! To which he counters with "lonely nursing home." Damn.

Easy shmeasy, red velvet peasy

It's a miracle! I tried a new recipe and not only did it turn out, the end result looks uncannily like the original photo!

See, there is this awesome post over on Bakerella where she made a heart-shaped box of chocolates for Valentine's Day but the box is really a fondant covered cake and the "chocolates" are petit four-like creations that look exact-o-mundo-ly like the real thing. It is quite an amazing work of art. Had me fooled. I mean, it looks so perfect! Who would want to eat it?!

I was so impressed with this box of chocolates masquerading as a cake (and am still shaking my head in disbelief) that my fingers started doing the walking through the rest of Bakerella's blog. And there, right before my very eyes, did the Easy and Easier Valentine's Treats appear. They looked scrumptious and the recipe sounded easy. A box of red velvet cake mix suddenly appeared in my grocery cart, and - voila! - we were embarking on the journey to see what these critters would taste/look like outside of the blogosphere. The final verdict:


YUM! They were quickly scarfed at the office party on Friday with barely a crumb remaining, so of course I had to make another batch this weekend. They are still yummy. Still easy. Still a huge hit. Still look like the original picture. It's a miracle!

(Note: if you catch my doctor reading this, please tell her I did NOT eat these gems. No cocoa or chocolate here. Nuh uh. Pinky promise! Well ... maybe a tiny taste for quality assurance ...)

Love you, too

Today is Valentine's Day. It is a most appropriate time to introduce you to a family phenomenon known affectionately as "momisms." We love these little critters, yes, we do. They surprise us, make us laugh, creep in to conversations at the most inopportune moments much like a preschooler, and contribute to the emotional intimacy of our everyday family life. Yes, love abounds for momisms.

Huh? "What's a momism," you ask? Ah. A momism is when yours truly (ie, mom) is thinking too fast and the words come out shmushed together. This is not just talking too fast (another habit), but actually combining words unintentionally. Here are the Turkey's favorites from the momism dictionary:

flow snurries = snow flurries
shopway = term for a jaunt to the grocery store, either Shoppers or Safeway

Momisms are the frequent cause of giggles and guffaws. We were driving home the other night and one such instance induced peals of laughter that rolled in to the gasping-for-breath-with-tears-streaming-down-the-cheeks-can't-talk-so-hafta-snort snorts. (Your first clue should have been that we were in the car.) What made this particular instance so lovingly special was not the actual momism, though. No. It was the hand motions demonstrating the shmushing of words that ignited the laughter fireworks. It went something like this: *left hand*, *right hand*, *clap*! (Ooo. Not as funny in print. Guess you had to be there. Drew does a great impression, though, so please feel free to ask him to demonstrate.)

Anywho ... I am often and lovingly reminded of momisms and of the momism clap. Oh, how we love momisms! And if the frequency of momisms is any indication, love abounds. Happy Valentine's Day!

Email

News flash! It is no longer necessary to use the mute monks, smoke signals, telepathy, maritime signal flags or Morse code to contact this blogger. If emailing is your preferred mode of communication, if you want a reply, if you are part of the 0.42% of readers not already on my contacts list, or if you just need another email address for yours truly, use this for communication:

pinkturkey (at) ymail (dot) com

After 10 months of blogging it's about time for an appropriately branded blogger email, doncha think?! So get busy! Send an email or two. Let me know your thoughts, ideas, likes, links to other super cool blogs, how you found the pinkturkey, what you're making for dinner, cash ... you get the idea. But if you still really want to use maritime signal flags:

Hallelujah!

There was an instance at the office today where we yet again learned that communication can be tricky. Both too much and too little communication can cause problems. So I pulled up this quirky video to remind us that even the mute monks find ways to communicate effectively. Sometimes we just need to think outside of the cue cards. Amen.

(Note: the first 1:30 of the video - the star warsesque text - is in the overcommunication category. Feel free to scroll through it. You won't miss much. I promise!)

Blogger's Block

Um.
Hell-looo out there?
What to write about?
Help!
There's some serious blogger's block happening.
Is there a blogger doc in the house?

Sigh. I'm having difficulty finding things that are appropriate for pink turkey and the blogosphere right now. We are still laughing but our days are filled with the trivial right now. It's the annual post-holiday lull where we're hunkered down in a warm house, the turkey is concentrating on his classes and homework, the calculus club is still meeting every Saturday night, work is work, I just had new tires put on the car (pure excitement, lemme tell ya!), my job as a chauffeur for a teenager is picking up (thus the new tires), Top Chef is Wednesday's entertainment, and you really don't have to the enter the HGTV Dream House giveaway because I'm destined to finally win it this year. I wouldn't necessarily call this a boring time in our lives, but let's just say we're flying on auto pilot for a while. No turbulance is a good thing! Sometimes I just have to remind myself of this.

Good morning. This is your captain speaking. Today's flight to Bloggerville and back looks very smooth. Flight attendants will be taking beverage orders and serving food shortly. I am turning off the fasten seat belt sign (*ding!*) and you are free to move about the cabin. Personal electronic devices are permitted. I will check in with you as soon as we have more instructions from ground. Thank you for flying Blogger Airways. Enjoy your flight!